Sunday, October 25, 2015

On Being a New Wizard in Arcadia--XVIII

    It was fully dark by the time he got back to his dorm. His nosebleed had restarted several times on the way, once with such suddenness and quantity that he had gotten light-headed and had to sit on one of the benches for a few minutes. Christian didn't want to see himself in the mirror, knowing full well that his beard and mustache were probably caked in blood at this point. It had dribbled all down the front of his coat and scarf, at any rate. A shower first, if his head could stop spinning long enough for him to scrub down, and then he would be in the basement with his laundry for a while. Exhausted, he unlocked his door and stumbled inside.

    Rei was sprawled across his bed, watching a video on his tablet. He set it down the second he realized Christian had come into the room. Alarmed, he came to his aid, helping him out of his coat and messenger bag. Christian felt a surge of weary gratitude to have such a friend. Rei gently guided Christian into his desk chair and knelt down to unlace his boots.

    "How long have you been bleeding?" Rei asked, his mouth set in a thin line. Christian leaned against his desk, propping his head against his fist.

    "Off and on for about an hour." It was almost a question. Christian was having a hard time pinning down a precise sense of time. "I went to the library, and then I got dizzy right where I got sick before."

    "You were not sick," Rei stated firmly. "You were not breathing. You were dying."  His gray eyes were pained as he looked Christian in the face. "I still do not know what I would do if you had died. You are the best friend I have ever had." He gave his arm a gentle squeeze.

    "I need to get cleaned up," Christian said thickly, feeling that distinct prickling at the corners of his eyes that always meant impending tears. Rei helped him to his feet. "I'll be okay, I think."

    Rei's eyes narrowed, and he set his jaw at its most obstinate angle. Christian slumped, defeated, and allowed Rei to shepherd him to the bathroom, toting a towel and robe and the shower caddy. He silently permitted Rei to help him out of his clothes, and was somewhat surprised that he was allowed to go into the shower stall alone. Rei stayed right outside, asking every few minutes if Christian was still okay. After he felt adequately clean, he cut off the water and leaned against the wall. Rei stepped in with a towel and helped him into his robe. Half-carrying Christian, Rei headed back to their room, shooting sharp looks at anyone who happened to look their way. Once back in their room, Rei helped him onto his bed, into pajamas, and under the covers. He put the dirty clothes into the hamper, then silently went about the important task of making tea. As soon as he had two mugs ready, he sat down on the floor next to Christian's bed.

    "Look," he said, worried. "I do not know what happened to you before, but I do know that toward the end of it you were not making sense. I do know that since then, you have been tense and strange and I think you saw things that man was not meant to see." Rei helped prop Christian up in bed and handed him one of the mugs. "I do not mean this in the way it gets over-played on the internet, but I mean this in the very literal way. You have seen some things that man was not meant to see." Christian nearly choked on his tea. Rei held up a hand. "Let me finish, please. You startle at shadows, you and your strange friends meet in odd places, and discuss strange things." He examined his long-fingered hands, not wanting to meet Christian's eyes. "You say very unsettling things in your sleep. I do not understand a lot of it. English is hard enough, and this is not English that you speak sometimes at night. I know you think you are hiding it well, and maybe to everyone else you are. But I worry for you. You are the best friend I have, and I know enough horror movies and books to know that things like this do not end well. Please, Christian," and he grabbed his wrist and stared him in the eyes," please, if you are in danger, I will do what I can to protect you, but I need to know that you will try to be safe."

    Christian's throat was constricted too tightly to speak. He was overcome with emotion, of course, but that wasn't what had caught just under his adam's apple and threatened to choke him. As far as he had been aware, he had not dreamed a single actual dream since before he had gone to the hospital, maybe just a few half-asleep fancies. He had assumed that his mind had simply cut off that part of itself, to protect him from nightmares or hazy, twisted memories as his body and spirit healed. To hear that he had spent most nights ranting in his sleep, and in strange languages, that made his throat knot against the rising scream trying to force its way out of him. Rei must have some sense of his distress, as he took the untouched mug of tea from Christian's shaking hands and set it on the desk, then caught Christian in a crushing embrace. That was enough to untie the knot, and Christian howled in terrified rage against Rei's chest.

    How long they stayed like that, he had no idea. A month's worth of suppressed pain and terror came roiling to the surface, and Christian let it loose. He sobbed, he howled, he let out every restrained emotion he had kept under tight rein. Rei just held him, making soft sounds of reassurance. Christian was vaguely aware of the door opening a handful of times, and Rei speaking in an undertone to whomever it happened to be. His energy was finally beginning to flag when he felt a strong, familiar set of hands gently pull him away. Sebastian smoothed Christian's hair back from his pale, sweating face and knelt at his bedside. Rei got up as unobtrusively as possible, saying something quietly to another party in the room. Sebastian shifted onto the edge of Christian's bed, so that Scott could come take a look. His thin face was pale with worry, but he betrayed no other emotion as he took Christian's pulse and looked him in the eyes.

    "You aren't supposed to get this worked up," Scott reminded him. "You're on pretty strict orders from the hospital and student health both to stay calm and rested." Christian could see small beads of sweat caught in Scott's thin, fine mustache and  along his hairline. "You're going to land yourself back in the hospital. I don't know if your body is up for this sort of over-excitement." Christian felt Sebastian's hand tighten against the small of his back.

    "Let him alone," Sebastian said raggedly. "He doesn't need a lecture from you on top of everything else." Scott didn't look offended at Sebastian's outburst. Instead he turned to Rei and took a mug from him. Christian tried to look like he felt anything other than numb indifference. Scott pushed the mug into Christian's hand.

    "Drink it. It's herbal tea. It'll calm you." Christian raised it to his lips. It may have been herbal tea, but it also smelled like Rei had put a hearty splash of straight Tennessee whiskey in there. It made for an unpleasant combination on the palette, and it burned his raw throat, but it sat warm and pleasant in his belly. Satisfied, Scott stood up and laid his hand against Christian's cheek. "Make sure that he gets plenty of fluids. I'm concerned about dehydration. Get me the second he starts to show any signs of back-sliding." With an attempt at a reassuring smile, Scott squeezed Christian's shoulder and left, shutting the door behind him. Sebastian looked at Rei.

    "Can you pour me one of those, but skip the herbal tea?" he asked, settling both himself and Christian more comfortably on the bed. Rei handed Sebastian a mug of his own, then sat down with his own glass and the half-empty bottle. The three of them sat in weary silence. The usual rowdy banging around from the hallway and other rooms seemed to be subdued tonight. Christian wondered just how loud he must have been, to put such a damper on his fellow residents.

    "You two need to know what happened to me," Christian said at last. Sebastian stiffened against his side. Rei shook his head, the barest movement, but clear in its refusal. "Yes." Christian insisted, dulled by weariness. "You're my dearest friend and you're my lover. You need to know what happened."

    "I'm going to make you stop if you start getting too distraught," Sebastian warned. Rei nodded agreement. "You've got that look in your eyes. You won't rest until this is out. Go slow, then, and we won't interrupt you with questions or commentary."

    And so, over the course of the night, Christian told them both the long, hellish saga from the beginning, starting with his inadvertent first steps along the ways, the surreal horrors that had begun writhing into existence during that cursed week, the hideous cat-and-mouse game he had played with the inhuman hunter on his infernal steed, his subsequent besting of that same hunter under the watchful gaze of the Veiled Lady, his dying (which of course Rei had dragged him back from), and every last single aspect of his life since he had come back to himself, right up to his collapse that afternoon. To eradicate any lingering doubts they might have held about the veracity of his tale, Christian steadied his mind long enough to bring a small, bright globe of magefire into existence, a small, blue-purple star blazing in the palm of his hand. His fatigue prevented him from holding it any longer than a moment, but it was enough.  It was also enough to make him light-headed. He slipped down into a reclined position, head resting against Sebastian's thigh. He watched for their reactions, afraid they would run from the room or yell for Scott to call the ambulance. He started badly when Sebastian began to caress the back of his head, smoothing his hair. It was such a tender gesture, full of absolute love, that Christian didn't quite know what to do.

    "It's insane," Sebastian murmured at last, still petting Christian's hair. "It sounds like utter madness."

    "Madness that is truth," Rei answered softly. He gave Christian a pitying look. "I wish you had told me sooner. I would have not been afraid."

    "I'm not afraid," Sebastian retorted, his dignity wounded. "It's a lot to try to process."

    "I need you two to forget for a while," Christian muttered drowsily. "I can't stand you two treating me differently. I wish I had kept it to myself."

    "Where it would you keep eating you alive?" Sebastian asked. "You may be immortal, or deathless, or whatever, but you're not invulnerable. At least you aren't invulnerable to this...agony."

    "We will not forget," Rei said, "but we will not bring it up until you mention it again. That is the least we can do for you." Sebastian opened his mouth to argue, but snapped it shut under the heat of Rei's glare. "We have you."

    "I'm tired. I want to sleep now, okay?" Christian clung to Sebastian's leg like it was a life-preserver. Both Rei and Sebastian immediately agreed that he needed rest, almost too quickly. He was too empty to call them on it, though, and allowed himself to be tucked into bed like a small child. Sebastian stripped down to his t-shirt and boxer-briefs and slid under the covers next to him. It was usually cramped to try to have both of them squeeze into the room's twin-size bed, but for some reason it was a comfort to be pressed so tightly together. Feeling fragile and hollow, Christian dropped into deep slumber.

    If he dreamed, he did not know it.


    The morning felt late when he awoke. The room was empty, aside from himself and a plastic take-out box sitting on his desk. A note was propped against it. He sat up tentatively, unsure if he would have the strength to remain vertical. He still felt emptied, but not as dizzy. Carefully, he crawled along his bed until he got close enough to his desk to reach for the note. He recognized Scott's painstaking handwriting, and he unfolded the paper.

            Christian,
I came to check on you a few times during
the night, and I didn't feel the need to call the
doctor. I have called all your professors and
you are excused from classes for the day.
I also went and got you pancakes and bacon
from the dining hall. There's a bottle of OJ in
the fridge for you too. Try to avoid coffee and
tea today, and make sure you eat enough.
Rei and Sebastian said they would get any work
you might have missed.
Please be careful,
        Scott


    That was a relief. Christian found the orange juice in the fridge and drained half of it at one go. The pancakes and bacon did all right with a spin through the microwave. He was hungrier than he realized, and ate so quickly that he nearly gagged himself. It did a great deal to make him feel a bit more alive. He found some clean clothes, and dressed. The alarm clock stated it was about ten in the morning. There was no point in trying to find anyone. They'd all be in class still. Ah, but Red House would be mostly deserted at this time of day. His coat was still in the hamper, but with a couple of extra layers, his heavy jacket would suffice. Leaving a note for Rei and Sebastian, Christian made his way downstairs and off campus.

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